World Domination: "Directed" by Christopher Nolan

           Programming note: I don’t know a lot about politics. I don’t know enough to endorse one candidate over the other. I’m simply a person who sees silly things happen, and enjoys commenting on them. This week, a conservative radio host said something I personally felt was stupid relating to comic books, so I’m going to comment on it. If you’re offended, don’t worry, jokes about robot invasions and squirrel armies are coming up. Hopefully, you just enjoy this for what it is: a good old fashioned attempt to write my blog about a popular subject in the hopes that search engines will find it easier.

Earlier this week noted marriage enthusiast and right-wing radio shouter Rush Limbaugh complained that the upcoming Dark Knight Rises contains a hidden message to voters against candidate Mitt Romney. Apparently Candidate Romney was involved in something about “Bain Capital” which I don’t understand enough to judge, and the villain of the movie is named “Bane”. So naturally Mr. Limbaugh believes that movie written three years ago about a fictional character created almost 20 years ago has something to do with politics today. However, his rant makes me sad for a number of reasons that are not linked in any way, shape or form to politics.

                1. It makes me sad as a comic book fan. Bane was created in 1993 to capitalize on the “Death of Superman” storyline by having something tragic happen to Batman. In this case, Batman was going to face against someone as smart as him, so the writers at the time came up with this hulking mass of a man who was addicted to a strength enhancing drug called “Venom”. It actually launched an interesting storyline about what it means to be the caped crusader as Batman was replaced by an insane man that liked to hurt people, which was a departure from the regular character who dresses up like a bat. But this was almost 20 years ago. Candidate Romney didn’t exist in that form back then. So unless the Batman writers back then: Graham Nolan, Chuck Dixon, and Doug Moench used their physic powers to predict a major point in the 2012 Presidential election and not to say, win the lottery, this is a moot point.

                This isn’t even the first movie appearance of Bane. He was also in Batman and Robin. Technically this wasn't a real Batman movie. Or it was, but no one wants to talk about it.

                2. It makes me sad as someone that wants to teach the English Language to people. First, Bain and Bane aren’t spelled the same, although they sound alike, I guess.  The word bane means “death, destruction, etc.” It’s actually a very old word that literally used to mean “murderer” in its earliest appearances terrorizing young English children. (This is opposed to its current form terrorizing young American children, because it’s also a fun SAT word.)

“Bane” is an awesome name for a supervillain because it gives the idea that he is the “bane of the superhero’s existence.” Quite frankly, I’m disappointed that it took until 1993 for a major villain to be named “Bane” in the first place. People underestimate how difficult it is to name a good supervillain. All of the really cool names are already taken. Even the cool sounding regular names like “Lex Luthor”.

                3. It makes me sad as a fan of someone who is afraid of supervillains in general. Not the fake ones like Bane in The Dark Knight Rises, but its director: Christopher Nolan. Because if Mr. Limbaugh is correct, Christopher Nolan has access to a working time machine, went back in time, told the writers of the Batman comic in 1993 to name their character Bane so he could write a movie that could potentially harm a future presidential candidate.

Now, Christopher Nolan also won praise for his previous Batman movies, especially for how he wrote the Joker. How does he know superheroes and supervillains so well? It must be because CHRISTOPHER NOLAN IS A SUPERVILLAIN! Access to a working time machine, tons of money, quieting the masses with his movies, knowledge of the superhero mind… it’s all a perfect fit.

                Remember, I’m the only blogger brave enough to discuss with you the growing Christopher Nolan menace. When he is sitting behind his desk, stroking his white cat as his minions count the profits from his latest movie, it's only World Domination the man has on his mind.

               Of course, our other option is that everything is just a coincidence, and this Batman movie used the character of Bane because Christopher Nolan wanted a cool villain for his supposed last movie in this trilogy. Just throwing that last part out there.