Thursday, May 31, 2012

Customer Service Representative, Part 3

Dear Mr. Thomar, the Bringer of Inconceivable Destruction,

            Franklin Family Construction is flattered by your counter offer of 10,000 gold pieces and seventy goats to aid in the construction of your “Castle of Doom atop the Highest Mountain Surrounded by a Moat of Pain”. However, this is clearly well below the estimate we originally sent. Such a fee is not enough to cover our permits to build outside the United States, much less in another dimension. The estimate plainly stated that the Moat of Pain itself was going to cost at least fifty goats.

            In addition, our highly skilled crew would be unable to work under your foreman, Lord Bramer, Fist of Death. We have our own foreman, Jeff, who is quite adept at motivating our crew without whipping or constant threats that they be sent to the Pit of Perpetual Terror. Of course, we understand there are many different ways to motivate a crew. Jeff has just found another way to get his crew working in his own way. Different motivation tactics for different people, as they say.

            Should you choose to accept the original estimate, we will be able to begin work next Tuesday. This will give us plenty of time to finish construction well before the Festival of the Solar Dragon in six months. I believe this was your timetable in ensuring a proper tribute to the Old Ones, and thus allowing you to take your rightful place as leader of your home dimension. Any other delay and I am afraid we will have to cancel this project, and move onto another.

            Thank you very much for your time.


            T. Franklin
            Customer Service Representative
            Franklin Family Construction

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