Sunday, February 24, 2013

Bad Shakespeare's Oscar Picks!

Ok, ladies and gents... Bad Shakespeare and Company have watched all nine Oscar Nominated movies, and I’m ready to make some picks, so you don’t have to. Also, I’m saying who I think should win, which may be different than the experts. I’m cool like that.

Best Picture: The toughest thing about picking Best Picture is the fact that I saw all the pictures at once, so they’re blurring together. I have them mostly sorted out, but someone is going to have to explain to me why Lincoln stole Jamie Foxx’s wife and he enlisted Ben Affleck to save him.

Honestly, I would like to see Django Unchained win. Quite frankly, it was just different than any of the other nominees and it was simply an amazing film with everything combined, acting, directing, writing, music, the profanity...... even the laughs and the drama were incredible. This was everything I wanted in a movie. Yes, some parts were uncomfortable. But anyone who says that this was uncomfortable, but the diaper changing and shower scenes in Amour weren’t, is messed up. But there’s no way it will win.

What should win is Argo. Hands down, one of the best movies of the year. I’ve told about a million Lincoln spoiler jokes, but Argo was a story I was familiar with. I knew those hostages made it out of there safely. But I was still biting my fingernails towards the end, and I was still wondering if they are going to make it. That’s how you make a movie.

Lead Actor: I’m going to have to go with Hugh Jackman. He basically did what every last person on this list did, but he did it while singing. Plus, this is something that’s missed out on people: He’s Wolverine. No, I’m not saying that because halfway through I expected the claws to pop out. I’m saying go watch one of the X-Men movies, then come back to that. Tell me that’s not a spectacular actor.

Lead Actress: Jennifer Lawrence. Look, I don’t think Silver Linings Playbook was a fantastic end all be all movie. It was great. But I can’t deny the fact that she was amazing in it as a severely damaged woman, sort of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl from Hell. I wasn’t sure if she was going to fall in love with Bradley Cooper or rip him to shreds. Even after they’re in their happily ever after, I’m still not sure.

Actor in a Supporting Role: Yeah, if that’s not Christoph Waltz, I don’t know who is. He commanded every scene he was in, he took over the role, and I was rooting for him about five seconds after he was on the screen. I’m going to be disappointed if I ever meet him and he’s not in character as Dr. King Shultz. 

Actress in a Supporting Role: If it’s not Anne Hathway, the winner should just play a Youtube Clip of her singing “I Dreamed a Dream” and try to pretend their role was better. It wasn’t. Plus, she was Agent 99 in the film version of Get Smart, so don’t tell me she didn’t pay her dues.

Since I haven’t seen all the movies in creation, I won’t worry about the minor technical awards like “Hair Styling” or “Writing.” But I hope you enjoy the Oscars! Personally, I’m going back to bed.

Also: a very special thanks for the “and Company” part of this. This is usually a solo effort, and attempting to write nine reviews in 24 hours wasn’t easy. So I wanted to say...

Thank you to Marissa for convincing me to do it and going to get extra popcorn and soda while I was typing away on my ipad, and jumping every time the tiger appeared out on Life of Pi and keeping me awake.

Thank you to Kim for coming up with the first few titles and a few of the better jokes, and for bringing yummy treats that helped avoid a few extra trips to the candy bar.

Thank you to Kati for not spoiling the ending of Lincoln despite the fact that I kept begging her to tell me what happened. 

Thank you to Jerome for going to get the dinner, which was crucial at that juncture as I was busy catching up on these posts, and I was tired of popcorn. 

        Thank you to everyone who came with me for understanding when I rushed off to type a review after each of the shows. I wasn't being anti-social, and I love you all.

        And a special thank you to all of you for following my adventures!

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