Friday, February 1, 2013

Me Fail English? That's Unpossible.

So, exactly one week from the time this post has been postedly posted, I will be doing something that scared the hell out of me. No, not bear hang gliding. Not gluing acorns to myself and running through squirrel packs screaming, “Lunch time!” Nor will I be attempting to fend of the upcoming robot invasion by myself. And certainly not telling my wife what I really think of her cooking. This time next week I will be taking the Praxis 2. 

DUN DUN DUHHHHHHH!!!! (If this were a movie, the camera will pull in to my closely as I admit this. Also, the line about squirrels would probably only be on the DVD extras.)

Anyway, for those of you who are not up on the lingo and don’t want to spend time Googling “Praxis 2” that’s basically a big test that if I pass says that I’m qualified to teach High School English. If I fail, then I’m only qualified to make zany comments on the internet, but I lose my amateur status and will therefor be unable to comment on the Olympics. It’s all very complicated.

The truth is, I’m scared. It’s been a rocky road up until this point. An actual rocky road, not the delicious, delicious ice cream. I’ve been studying, but there’s so much that goes on with this particular test I feel like no matter how much I study, I’m going to miss something. There are all kinds of study guides and tests, and I’ve been looking through them all, hoping to find some secret code that will allow me to hit on the magic combo that let’s me pass this test. (So far, I’ve found a code on the back of the Constitution and another one that tells me the secret ingredient to KFC. It’s salt.)

While I’m working out my fears here, on my blog in public, I also wanted to let you all know what’s coming up. For starters, this post here is going to be my second to last post until AFTER the test, in one week. So you’ll be spending next week Bad Shakespeare-less. I know that’s like taking away your Fruity Trix like I’m some fruit obsessed white rabbit, but I have to focus on studying to ensure that I hit up my dream: Being a teacher. Plus, imagine how much better the posts will be after a whole week of things going on! 

But note that I said SECOND to last for the week. Tomorrow, I’m proud to announce a special Groundhog Day crossover between Bad Shakespeare and the Island of Misfit toys. Tomorrow, you will be reading an excellent piece by The Island’s Erin Garland, and regular Island readers will be regaled by Bad Shakespeare. Remember while I’m gone to play nice with her.

However, next week at this time, please say a special prayer/thought to whatever deity you currently believe in, whether it’s God, Zeus, or Nicolas Cage, that I pass this test, and get that much closer to being a teacher. It’s Friday, people. You’re not using any of that brain power, anyway, send it to me. Me think good.

Also, remember that there are over 119 posts (120 to be exact) on this blog. If you haven’t read them yet, they’re new to you!

1 comment:

  1. You're going to do great! We'll all say a collective prayer to Nicholas Cage (specifically Con Air Nicholas Cage because I feel like that particular version would be good in this situation).